Parents are turning inclusion into exclusion

I recently called an IEP meeting to discuss my daughter’s preschool situation — that 2.5 hours per day is simply not enough time to adequately develop her social and emotional development. It was during my preparation for this meeting that I realized that the biggest obstacle for parents of children with disabilities is other parents!

As I sat there making my argument for my brilliant and beautiful little ball of dynamite, I discussed things like her daycare expulsions, isolation from her peers outside of school, and even rattled off the many activities we weren’t welcomed back at. The Child Study Team looked at me like some maniac, not understanding how a 4-year-old could be excluded from everywhere already and I had to actually break this down for them: Exclusion is a form of bullying. And yes, it starts outside of the classroom.

It started at a toddler gymnastics class we attended once, long before her diagnoses, my daughter was overwhelmed on the first day with excitement and anxiety about the lights, the smells, the open space. Within fifteen minutes of her being distracted and wandering around the room, the other parents whispered and complained to the manager. One mom made sure to tell me to my face that my daughter had ruined the class for her daughter and how she needed a make-up class because of it. I laughed awkwardly because I…